Not Like Normal People

Quick Poll on Voting (USA)

Simple question, no specific context to influence your opinion.

Do you believe that voting controls how government operates?
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This is Why Your Kids Will Hate You: Facebook photo edition

Stipulated I know odd people and they tell me the oddest of things.

Counter-stipulation This twitter account is followed by fewer than 600 people and this conversation took place at 10PM Pacific time, so most of them were offline.

@fullcircleadv: I've officially seen it all: Facebook profile pic of child's first poop in the potty. I guess they made. (followed by) And this was a reasonably sane/rational person too.

Now maybe it's just me, and I know I have been out of the big city for a few years, but is this a thing? How is this a thing? I get it, you are proud of your special snowflake flower for those firsts. But it is poop. We know what poop looks like. We don't need a photo. Your kid's poop looks like every other kid's and, yes it does stink.

Also, crazy and distasteful as posting a photo of your kid's poop on your wall, using it as your profile picture is pretty much the antithesis of sane and rational.

I shook this off as a bit of one-off over-sharing and then I got this.

@JessieKPhoto oh god, I that happened to me this year too. I can't believe some people.

followed rapidly by the cake-taking...

@SaltySpoon I was at a dinner party last yr with ppl who passed around poo pics on Blackberry. I wanted to burn the hosts' house down.

Okay three people that fast means that some reporter is writing a trend piece even as I search for brain bleach. What the hell...?

You may think it's cute but by the time your child is in high school, some asshat will have opened babysfirstpoophotos.com and your kid's cutesy-poo poop will be available for viewing indexed by birth name, or social media handle of your choice. You don't want the pooquivalent of this to happen to your child, do you?

Seriously. People. Just stop.

Your Facebook friends will thank you. Your kids will thank you. Even I, who only have to hear about the poo second-hand will thank you.

I started to look for links for this and after two screens decided that I just couldn't. I mean, encouraging this (literal) shit just squicks me out. For the "pictures of it didn't happen" crowd, however, I offer a single link, in the interest of proving this is real. STFU Parents where pictures of poo are not the worst image you won't be able to get out of your head.

Open Letter to News Men on "This Abortion Thing"

Dear Men on the News,

Tonight I heard Lawrence O'Donnell say "This abortion thing has always been kind of confusing when you try to make sense of what Herman Cain is saying..." He said this to another man. Then he cut to film of three men (Cain, John Stossel and another guy who never spoke) who were also discussing the abortion thing.

Let's start with something really obvious: If you say "This abortion thing" perhaps you shouldn't be discussing it. Secondly, if you can't effectively parse the following, please ask a woman. Almost any woman. She can.

Cain: I'm pro-life from conception.
Stossel: Any cases where it should be legal?
Cain: I don't think government should make that decision.
Stossel: I'm confused
Cain: I'm pro-life period.
Stossel: If a woman is raped she should not be allowed to end the pregnancy.
Cain: That's her choice. It's not government's choice. I support life from conception.
Stossel: So abortion should be legal.
Cain: NO it should not be legal. I believe in the sanctity of life.
    (cut to silent guy with Munchian open mouth)
Stossel: I'm not getting...I'm not understanding. If it's her choice that means it's legal.
Cain: I don't believe a woman should have an abortion. Does that help to clear it up?
                                           (with John Stossel on Fox July 2011)

Cut back to MSNBC and a couple of baffled looking men.

Okay, so Herman Cain is new at politics and hasn't gotten good at outright lying to the press. Give him time.

But, seriously, how is this hard to parse? This is Cain's position (backing quote in parens)

• Abortion should be illegal in the US (No it should not be legal.)
• Women should be able to defy the law if government tries to control her choice. (That's her choice.)

Still not clear?

Pre-Roe, rich women left the US or went to clinics whose addresses were secretly traded when someone got 'in trouble' and poor women used whatever desperate measure was available -- and died far too often.

That's what Herman Cain supports.

Should you need help with "this abortion thing" in the future, please feel free to drop me a note.

Love,

~beth

Apple's Precioussss New Building

With their recent claim to "World's Richest Company" - a title that comes and goes depending on the whims of those that play with such markets - you'd think Apple would be happy to grow their thralldom fan base at a reasonable rate and with a little discretion.

Yeah, you would be wrong. So very, very wrong.

On Reclaiming Cunt

Ann Wilson (of Heart) stepped onstage and ripped out a trademark "Oooooh, Barra...cunta!"

I looked at my daughter, who had brought me to the Vagina Monologues, raised an eyebrow (or two, I never did nail that Rock-like single eyebrow thing) and smiled. "Barracunta!" Ann again, "Now you all say it with me."

That pin-drop silence you always hear about? It happened.

Then, as one, we inhaled and we did. "Barracunta!" Tentatively.

1400 Women -- and a few brave men -- ranging from barely pubescent to elderly. "Barracunta!"

"Barracunta!" Then we did it again. "Barracunta!" And again. "Barracunta!" Louder each time. "Barracunta! Barracunta!" until we were all on our feet and the building shook. "Barracunta! Barracunta! Barracunta!"

I imagine that some of those brave men thought they were in some "Barracunta Madness" where having said it three times, the spirit of Barrracunta would now step out of the mirror into the room and come at them, wild-eyed, brandishing a kitchen cleaver...

As the echoes of "Barracunta...cunta..." died away, women who had been strangers moments before locked eyes and smiled and laughed. It was a real bonding moment.

Barracunta bonding.

I get all misty I am woman, hear me roar Barracunta! just thinking about it.